Emphasize The Positive

    Charlie Shedd was a marriage counselor.  He believed that a couple who was having marital issues could only see the problems in their marriage.  The challenge was to get the couple to see what was good in their marriage instead of seeing only problems.
    To meet the challenge of getting a couple to see the good in their marriage, Charlie would have the husband and the wife write separate lists of what irked them in their spouse’s behavior.  Composing this list was easy because when you fight your spouse’s faults are right before you.  The lists were then shared with the other.  Then Charlie would have the couple compose a second list which defined what each liked about their spouse.  This was a very difficult list to write.  Remember, they were fighting.  The couple exchanged lists.  Then, each promised to read out loud the list of what they liked about their spouse each day.  Charlie’s theorized that a husband or wife could better manage the negatives in marriage if they were constantly reminded of what they liked in their spouse.
    I have begun to compile a list of what I like about Epiphany so when the first frustrating day arrives (and it will) I will be able to read my list of positives to counter balance what is irking me.  Following is my list thus far.
    I really like the pride that the disciples of Epiphany and its staff take in their ministry.  For example, when I visited the Pantry, its staff beamed as they showed me all that they do to help those in need.  I see pride in the assisting ministers and in preparing PowerPoint slides.  These examples of pride exude enthusiasm which is contagious.
    Closely connected to pride is the joy of those who serve.  This joy indicates responsibilities are well matched with spiritual gifts.  Epiphany’s disciples are energized and work many hours because they enjoy what they are doing.
    I really like the willingness to change.  In my first week, I noticed that every morning the “guest” parking spots were filled.  At staff meeting I asked where are all the “guests?”  Guest parking during the week was translated in “staff parking.”  We now have several guest parking spots open to make those visiting Monday through Friday feel welcome.  The lights over the staircase from the lower to upper levels have been turned on so that Epiphany is a more inviting place.  For staff to park in the spots not marked for guests and for all gathering space lights to be on are big things.  They indicate we really want Epiphany to grow and thrive.
    Finally, I like the forward thinking of the staff.  I have been in conversation on how to create a new structure for the reporting on the budget so Council can see quickly the scope of Epiphany’s ministry.  I have had conversations on how to raise Epiphany’s visibility (marketing) in the community.  These are internal changes which will enhance the effectiveness of decision making and ministry.
    I am going to continue to add to my list of likes about Epiphany.  If you were to compile your own list of likes about Epiphany, what would be on that list?
    Two quick additional thoughts.  First, a list of likes about Epiphany can easily be shared with non-members as a way to invite them to come to the Lenten small groups, other ministry programs, and worship.  Second, making a list about what you like about your work, your friends, and other activities can make a big difference in what you feel about life.
Pastor Pete